It is amazing how much my son makes me smile and laugh. There is so much joy in children and mine is no different. They are so innocent and small but they are full of joy. I love the times when my son will be playing with his toys and just simply look up at me and smile. It seems to come for no reason but the fact that I am there looking at him. His whole face lights up and he lets out a small shriek. Sometimes I wonder what he would say if he could talk. I imagine him telling me "Thanks, mom, for always being here with me!"......but who knows :) It is such a joy to see children grow and discover the world around them. Caleb is so funny when he plays with one specific toy....it's a duck that has a rattle inside and there is a tag on the underside. He always manages to find that tag and look at it very intently (sometimes for a couple minutes). When he notices you looking at him (and sometimes Kirk and I laugh a bit) he will just carry on playing like nothing ever happened. We always get a good laugh out of that.
Caleb has also learned how to do "pull ups" in his swing. It is as if he thinks there is something else just on the other side of the swing that he needs to see.....it cracks me up every time.
Oh, what a fun age 6 months is! I look back at some of the previous blogs and realize how fast time flies. It seemed like just yesterday we were struggling with nap times, eating difficulties, not sleeping well at night, and wondering if I was going insane :)......now, it seems that things have turned around (although there are still daily struggles, don't get me wrong). The feelings of helplessness have turned into a joy filled heart; tears of despair and heartache have now become tears of joy in realizing what an amazing gift I have in my son; the frustrated feelings have turned into a bit of sadness as I realize that my "little baby" is now getting bigger (he can no longer fit in the crook of my arm to eat)! Oh how the times flies!
I praise God for this time in my life. There have been so many difficult and painful times that are now being followed with a joyful heart and sounds of joy (and sometimes joyful screams!:) from my son. I know there will be more difficult times to come, but I rejoice in knowing that God went and continues to go through those valleys with me and brings me up to the peak of the mountain after molding me and shaping me into a new person. I am humbled and blessed by His amazing love for me. What a precious gift I have been given in Caleb!
---kinda random and scattered thoughts today but just some things on my heart :) Thanks for listening.
1 comment:
I totally know what you mean about the excitement of your children learning something new but then the flip side of realizing that they are getting older. I'm dealing with that even now with a 6 and 9 year old. I look at Caleb and Eden and wish that I could hold my kids that way again. I miss those times when they were babies. Now it is so scary because Corbin and Sutton are entering into a time of their lives where they are starting to be influenced by those around them. They are around their peers longer than they are around us now. That's a scary thought! I have such a big job now as a mother to guide these guys and give them encouragement even more because of that influence. It's scary!!!
Cherish your times with Caleb. I'm so happy for you and Kirk. There will probably always be times when you will want a little bit of time for yourself. Don't feel guilty about that. You need to take time for yourself to be a better mom. The kids appreciate the time out that you give to yourself because they reap the benefits. You and Kirk also need to take time when it is just the two of you. You need to continue to nurture your relationship. It's just as important as the relationship with your kids because when the kids are out of the home, it's just going to be you two. Not to mention, the kids also benefit from seeing a healthy, vibrant, strong, loving relationship between their parents. Anyway, thanks for being open and honest with your feelings and please know that Terry and I would babysit any time you needed a sitter. :)
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